Golly, I Could Make a Habit of This
Here's another actual email transcript. But it requires a smidge of explanation.
Last Friday The Neighbor was, per usual, over to watch "Battlestar Galactica". She mentioned, when she arrived, that she'd grabbed the wrong keys upon leaving, thus locking herself out of her own house, so she'd need to borrow mine at the end of the evening.
'Cept when I went to the hooks wot hold the keys, hers wasn't there. Which was weird, because I'd used it fairly recently.
One of her kids bailed her out and it was all fine but as she is leaving on vacation in a few days we needed to make sure I had a key and she was going to make another one for me but today I was able to send her this:
-------Original Message---------
From: Lorraine
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 7:30 AM
To: The Neighbor
Re: Your Key
Neighb,
I found it. It had fallen into the little thingy that collects bottle caps.
(Ed. Under the hooky googa that holds the keys is a vintage Coke bottle opener and under that is a little whoozy that catches the bottle caps. The Spouse uses it. For beer, mostly, not so much the Coke).
Nayb
-----Original Message-----
From: The Neighbor
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 1:57 PM
To: Lorraine
Subject: Re: Your Key
I'm so glad it has been found! Whatever compelled it to want to associate with bottle caps?
From: Lorraine
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 2:00PM
To: The Neighbor
Subject: Re: Your Key
It was Friday night...the bottle caps were feeling a little rowdy...they invited the key over (because, you know, if you're going to have a big, noisy party it's best to just invite the neighbors) and obviously it was a pretty killer time because the key has been sleeping it off in there ever since.
Unless, of course, it was just waiting patiently because, what with having no actual hands or feet, it couldn't crawl home on its own.
From: The Neighbor
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008, 4:45PM
To: Lorraine
Subject: Re: Your Key
I knew you'd have an explanation for it.
Last Friday The Neighbor was, per usual, over to watch "Battlestar Galactica". She mentioned, when she arrived, that she'd grabbed the wrong keys upon leaving, thus locking herself out of her own house, so she'd need to borrow mine at the end of the evening.
'Cept when I went to the hooks wot hold the keys, hers wasn't there. Which was weird, because I'd used it fairly recently.
One of her kids bailed her out and it was all fine but as she is leaving on vacation in a few days we needed to make sure I had a key and she was going to make another one for me but today I was able to send her this:
-------Original Message---------
From: Lorraine
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 7:30 AM
To: The Neighbor
Re: Your Key
Neighb,
I found it. It had fallen into the little thingy that collects bottle caps.
(Ed. Under the hooky googa that holds the keys is a vintage Coke bottle opener and under that is a little whoozy that catches the bottle caps. The Spouse uses it. For beer, mostly, not so much the Coke).
Nayb
-----Original Message-----
From: The Neighbor
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 1:57 PM
To: Lorraine
Subject: Re: Your Key
I'm so glad it has been found! Whatever compelled it to want to associate with bottle caps?
From: Lorraine
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 2:00PM
To: The Neighbor
Subject: Re: Your Key
It was Friday night...the bottle caps were feeling a little rowdy...they invited the key over (because, you know, if you're going to have a big, noisy party it's best to just invite the neighbors) and obviously it was a pretty killer time because the key has been sleeping it off in there ever since.
Unless, of course, it was just waiting patiently because, what with having no actual hands or feet, it couldn't crawl home on its own.
From: The Neighbor
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008, 4:45PM
To: Lorraine
Subject: Re: Your Key
I knew you'd have an explanation for it.
Labels: Battlestar Galactica, sneezing, stuff
cobbled together by Moi at 6:39 PM
12 Comments:
The Neighbour is witty.
Another reason to book plane tickets.
I'm sorry...The Neighbor is witty? I mean, she is but what am I chopped liver or just a free couch to sleep on while you are tossing bon mots with the intelligensia?
Sheesh.
What a delight! I needed that, Lorraine
Greeny, it is my duty to provide you with cheerful, uplifting content whenever possible. Especially in lieu of the whole not-being-able-to-invite-you-over-for-a-cocktail-on-the-spur-of-the-moment-thing.
I love being the intelligensia.
I like saying "intelligensia" with a russian accent and I definitely like how JP added a U to neighbor. Added more colour to my day.
Have a great weekend neighbour....and Lourraine....and everyboudy!
Neighb, yeah, just remember twas me wot called you intelligensia. JP merely said you were witty.
Sfoof, it was a nice touch, wasn't it? (I read stuff as if it's in foreign accents all the time).
The fermented stuff in bottle caps can do that to a key, for sure.
..I can't believe JP dissed you like that.
Silly drunken bottle caps.
Sling, right? Sheesh.
Hilarious! :)
You've been hittin' the Bud Light, havent' you MHP?
Post a Comment
<< Home