That's Nice

Every day I do a bunch of things that go unnoticed. In fact, my life is such that most of the time there are only comments when one of those things goes undone. No one walks into the house and says, "Golly gosh, thanks a ton for doing all that laundry today". They may, ocassionally, say things like, "Uh, I'm running out of socks".

Now, strictly speaking, I'm not a housewife for the glory. (I'm in it for the stupendous salary). For the last 14 years, I've stayed home because I wanted to and because, thanks to The Spouse's generous income, I could. I stayed home because being around to raise my child and care for the household brought me fulfillment and joy. It also gave me time to pursue my other interests. The fact that I'm not receiving accolades, bouquets and being feted on a daily basis is immaterial. Truth told, I'd have to clean the house and do laundry even if I was the only person living here so really it's not a big deal.

Should The Child thank me every day for being the worst bestest mom ever? Should she be abundantly grateful that I've been around for her? Should The Spouse be eternally grateful that I pay the bills, change the sheets, walk The Dog, dust the piano and put a decent meal on the table 7 nights a week? I get as much out of all that as they do so it's pretty much a wash.

The truth is, I'm just as skilled at taking for granted the gifts they bring to the table. Maybe the point is that we could all do a better job of appreciating each other but I'm not convinced that the fact that we don't somehow diminishes what we do.

All that said, it is nice when the people in our lives make a special effort at acknowledging what we do for them. I had such a moment today. The Child is now in possession of her yearbook and this morning she came out with it. Each 8th grader wrote a little paragraph to accompany his or her "senior" photo, part reflection, part thank you.

"Did you read Fifi's bio?" she asked. "I think you should".

She handed me the book and pointed to the place. There, at the end of her piece Fifi had written, "I want to especially thank Mrs. Thomas for giving me a ride to school for 2 long years".

Hello? She didn't thank her teachers (although I'm sure she's grateful to them). She didn't thank the principal (although she most certainly owes her a debt). No, the person she singled out was little ol' moi for doing nothing more than ferrying her to and from school.

I give rides to 2, sometimes 3 extra kids. This is not a spectacular feat. They live right on the route to school and it is no trouble at all to pick them up. It takes virtually no more time or gas or effort to car pool than to not. Every single day they thank me. They say "thank you" when I drop them at school, they say "thank you" when I drop them at home. So it's hardly like I've felt put upon.

But still, there was something really sweet about Fi making that public declaration. And when I picked the kids up this morning I got out of the car and gave her a big hug. Because it is nice to be appreciated.