You Kiss Your Mama with That Mouth? and Other Headlines

The always respectful, ever charming Ann Coulter is at it again. Speaking at the Conservative Political Action Conference, in front of several candidates for the GOP nomination, she opened fire on various Dems with her usual attempt at witty invective. She made fun of Al, Bill and Barack saying the sorts of unkind, not-funny things that any decent parent would punish a kid for saying on the playground. And then she used the "f" word in reference to John Edwards because, oddly, that's her fall back whenever she can't think of anything else to say about a Democrat.

None of this is surprising, of course. It's to be expected from the poor thing. I do think, however, it might be pleasant to see some of the folks present, like Mitt Romney and Rudy Gulliani, step up and suggest that such language has no place in the public discourse; particularly since their appearance at this event had a lot to do with their desire to position themselves as the "moral values" candidate.

Oh! And speaking of moral values, here's an interesting story. The National Association of Evangelicals is getting some pressure from outside conservative groups. Afraid that a broader view of what "moral values" might entail will dilute the message of hate focus of the religious right, folks like James Dobson are urging the NAE to get rid of their policy director, the Rev. Richard Cizik. Why? He thinks global warming and human rights are moral issues, too, and he won't stop talking about it. Because when God asked humankind to care for His creation, it was just a suggestion. And when Jesus said "love one another as I have loved you" He just meant the people you agree with. (Happy to clear that up for you).

Meanwhile, you'll be delighted to learn that despite rhetoric to the contrary, US emissions are increasing. Go team!

In the "Remain Calm, Nothing to Worry About. It's Not Like We'd Ever Use One" category, we're happy to announce that a "design contest" has come up with a winner for a new nuclear warhead. I always say, it's not enough to be able to destroy the world several times over...you have to look good doing it.

And finally, lest you've been worrying that everthing is going to hell in a hand basket and everyone is just too touchy these days, here's some encouraging news: on Thursday the Swiss accidentally invaded Liechtenstein. Did the Liechtensteinians hastily deploy all their missles, sabers and other engines of destruction on the border? Did they send envoys and generals to the European Union asking for a coalition of the willing to strike out in retribution? Was there huffery and puffery in the UN Security Council?

No.

Pretty much the Liechtensteinie response was, "Meh". I believe there was also a shrugging of shoulders and then everyone had some beer and sausages. I find this to be a very affirming little story from which we might glean the following lesson: an offense is only an offense if you decide to be offended.