The Cardinal

One of the cool things about the friends who come to the Solstice and Autumnal Feasts is that they bring fabulous hostess gifts. (I'd invite them anyway because they are fabulous people but come on, who doesn't like prezzies?) This year The Boys brought The Spouse and I super fantastic his and hers coffee mugs emblazoned with H.R.H. on one side and either His or Her Royal Highness on the other. I much enjoy being referred to as Her Royal Highness and now I can have a little dose of esteem and veneration with my java. It's a good thing.

Once upon a time, many years ago, I used to hang out in a wine bar appropriately named Enoteca. This was, turns out, a pivotal spot in my young life for it was here that I met many friends who I still hold dear, including the man who would introduce me to The Spouse. But I get ahead of the story. (Actually, that's another story). One day a waiter arrived at work declaring that he felt "very Russian". It was a cold and dank winter day, I believe, so his sentiments were appropriate. The manager, who we will call Timofey, picked up on the mood and a great walloping lot of Russian references started being bandied about. Everyone's name changed: Michael began Mikail, Peter became Pyotr Petrofskovich and like that. When I arrived for lunch or an after work glass or whatever it was, I was hailed by Timofey as Lorrainskia. And thus it began. Over time Timofey expanded upon this. It was not enough that I be merely Lorrainskia. I must be a Grand Duchess. (This was fitting as I bruise like a Romanoff). Then, because Timofey has more arcane knowledge in his brain than anyone living, I became Her Imperial Highness, Lorrainskia Fabulovna, Princess of Minsk, Pinsk and Irekutsk.

These developments pleased me greatly for I have always thought it would be a good thing to be queen of the world and this was as good a start as any. In my royal capacity I designated Timofey as one of my chief advisors. I made him a cardinal, Cardinal Sin, because he looks good in red.

In fairly short order the Russian fiction faded away from the games we played at Enoteca. But Timofey and I never abandoned our personae, which has provided hours of amusement for both of us over the years. There are many things I could tell you about Timofey, and likely will, but for today, suffice that he is one of the most elegant, refined, intelligent and witty men I have ever known. And I'm not making that up. What I said about arcane knowlege? If you've read his comments to various posts you'll know what I mean. He doesn't have to look up that stuff...he just has it tucked away in a nook of his vast and expansive mind. He is an excellent cook and a delightful guest. He knows about wine without snobbery, he is an expert in the art of Japanese tea ceremonies, he served in the Navy, has fierce convictions but a gentle soul and I have been so pleased to count him as a good friend for just shy of 20 years. A girl simply must hang on to someone who so truly gets her love of the tiara.