Project Retreads

Now that's more like it! This week's episode gave us a little more of what I've been looking for the last 2 weeks...some drama, some humor, some actual designing that had a point. (I was going to say "relevance" but that seems to be Nina's signature word this season and knowing her, she's holding the copyright). We were also provided a valuable public service -Sweet P in a sleeveless dress-reminding all of us of the perils of tattoos. (Loving her but I really wanted to politely ask her to put on a sweater).

We open with the designers readying for the day. Most of them are mourning the auf'ing of Chris. They all liked him as much as we did. Jack was worried about a booboo in his nose because he's been HIV pos for 17 years (God BLESS pharmaceuticals) and fears this could turn into something more serious that will need to be treated.

Heidi brought out the models: "real" women who have recently lost a ton of weight. Each is wearing a favorite outfit from when she was heavy and the designers are challenged to create a new look for each woman, using her old clothes as the raw materials. The design had to be good for "every day" and express the designer's point of view. They got 15 minutes at Mood to spend $10 on bits and notions.

From the get-go, the designer with the biggest challenge was Steve, who was paired with a woman in a wedding dress. (Interesting choice for "favorite fat outfit" because I'm pretty sure that unlike the other clients, she actually didn't wear that thing every day. Really, frankly, not particularly fair, but who said life -or the producers of PR- were fair?) And Steve was certainly feeling the fear. Describing the dress as "death on a stick" he spent rather a lot of time musing on the possibilities of "polyester satin and acetate lace". To say he was disdainful of his materials would be an understatement.

Meanwhile, having privately talked with Jack, Tim calls the first "designers, gather 'round" of the night, where Jack tearfully announces that his doctor wants to see him right away and he'll be leaving the competition. ACK! Much sadness and woe ensues as everyone hugs him "goodbye" and then, visibly shaken, try to get started on their projects. Really, the vast majority of these designers seem like awfully nice people. I hope they bring Jack back for season 5 because I thought he was a good designer and wish he could have continued. Be well, Jack.

We get to see Ricky in heels as he tries on the jeans he's fitting for his now-thin client. That was hilarious. Then, 6 hours before the end of day 1, Tim returns with another "gather 'round", announces a surprise and in walks recently auf'ed Teddy Bear Chris, who's back in the game. Yippee! Feel the love.

Victorya was very subdued and decent this week. (Dig me, acting as if editing has no part in reality television. Ha! Victorya isn't decent. More likely, having dotted the last i on her evil plans, she's sitting back with brandy and a cigar, just waiting until the perfect hour to launch her full-on assault. I'm so over her. New drinking game: every time she says or does anything nice I say, "Shut up, Victorya, I still hate you" - sip).

During Tim's review of the projects I fear for Elisa. He comments that her dress represents her POV but he doesn't see it working for the client. So far, every time a designer has failed to listen to Tim they've been auf'ed. The Gunn must be heeded, people. Make a note of it.

Pissy Christian displays his remarkable ability to work while bad mouthing everything. I swear, his chipmunk voiced arrogance gives me the pips. Someone slap him.

Steve is still struggling with the fact that he's been given a wedding dress to work with (which he's mostly using as trim for an otherwise all black dress). "If Nina starts giving me trouble I swear....." he says. That made me laugh.

Meanwhile, Tim cautions Chris to "avoid costume crap". Yep, wise words. Because Chris came back late in the process, he's going to be given the night to work. Tim cautions him about making bad decisions in the wee hours saying, "I've made more bad decisions at 3 a.m. than I care to list". When Chris asks if he'll be back to check on him Tim says, "Maybe I will, after I've made my bad 3 o'clock decision". Altogether now: we LOVE the Gunn!

Day 2, the designers return to ooh and ahh over a slumbering Chris, who says that he can't even remember if he made anything. Well, yeah, he did. And I was worried.

The clients come in and are largely pleased with their outfits. Ricky's client is super happy which, yippee skippee, gets Ricky all choked up and we got a good blubber out of him as he says "This makes me remember why I do what I do".

Steve, saying things like "sweet merciful crap" is now reduced to gluing together his garment and both Kevin and Victorya ("Shut up, V. I still hate you" - glug) step up to help him with finishing touches.

Guest judge this week was Patrick Robinson. Who? Yeah. Head designer for The Gap. Whatever.

Highs:

First of all, let me tell you how much I loved this challenge. To take old clothes and make them new was one thing. To create outfits for formerly heavy women? Genius. Because anyone who has ever not felt good in her body knows that you carry that emotional weight even after the pounds are gone. After the weight loss comes the mental challenge of learning to feel good about yourself. Many of the designs really spoke to that, giving these women fitted, fab looks that allowed them to really own their new selves.

Classic case-in-point: the way Rami's model walked the runway in this. It said everything you could want about the power of a well designed outfit to make a woman feel superfantastic about herself. She worked it. Delightful.

Kors got bitchy about Kevin's design because he had his model in leggings. (Just for fun I googled "Michael Kors leggings". Yep. They were all over his spring collection. Idiot). I liked the look a lot and so did the client. Would you believe this top started out as a gigantic jacket? This was a classic example of meeting the requirements of the challenge, thankyouverymuch. Pissy Christian weighed in with this. Which, much as I dislike him, was super. The only thing that bothered me was that this jacket, down to the shiny trim down the front (which you can't really see here) was very similar to the 80s jacket the judges hated just a few weeks ago. Clearly it looks better in black.
In a photo-doesn't-do-it-justice moment I offer Jillian's dress, which was judged as 'sexy and tasteful". It had all sorts of little details, particularly, attractive pintucks that shaped the garment beautifully on the model. Lovely. Trust. However, the black trim you see there is all she used of the original garment, so she wasn't going to win this one.

Lows:

Nina hated Elisa's dress, saying that it was "very Elisa and not very Tracy" (the client). And yes, I personally thought it was a potato sack with layers but I did wonder from whence came Nina's authority to proclaim the look "not" that of the client. Do they regularly brunch together? Doubtful. Add to that, Tracy said she loved the look. Granted, this suggests all Tracy's taste is in her mouth but still, how she felt about it matters more than what Nina thinks. Pretty much, everything matters more than what Nina thinks. Steve, dear, funny Steve, was severely judged for turning a "wedding dress to a funeral dress". It was horrible. And you know why? Because Steve spent way too much of his time completely hung up on the fact that it was a wedding dress made of inferior materials. The Neighbor and I came up with half a dozen things he could have done that would have been totally impressive and we're not designers.

Chris was also in the bottom two, with this little number described (aptly, for once) by Kors as "Shirley MacLaine playing a hooker with a heart of gold". I would concur and further have to say that it looks to me like Chris' costume designer roots go way too deep. He's not going to make it to the final four unless he leaves that shtick behind and I don't see it happening. Nice to have him back but it won't be for long unless he gets way radical way fast.

Christian was deemed the winner (personally, I preferred Kevin or Rami's look but so far I still haven't been invited to be a guest judge). And Steve's inability to think outside of the box was his undoing and auf he went.

I'm not willing to call a final four yet but I can tell you I'll be surprised if Elisa, Ricky or Chris aren't the next 3 to go. Not necessarily in that order.

Until next week, mind your 3am decisions.

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Editorial note: I didn't dress up for PR last night because there was just no point what with the whole dead camera thing. Santa promised to bring me a new one. I asked Santa if we could expedite delivery, what with things like tree trimming upcoming and there being no camera. "Don't you have a camera in your phone?" asked Santa. Yeah, I do. But I don't know how to get said photos off the phone. Santa was not moved.