Wednesday, March 07, 2007

A Season or a Reason

Do you have someone in your life who ended up being so important to the trajectory of your life that, had you not met them, you'd be on a completely different path? I'm not talking necessarily about the mothers who brought us into the world or the teachers or mentors who sparked a particular passion. I'm talking about some regular old person from whom you can chart at least part of the course of your life.

I've got at least one. We called her Muffin. She and I met our freshman year of college. We had an apartment together that first summer in Seattle and ended up living together on 3 other occasions after that (until we finally realized that our friendship was more important the inevitable drama that would ensue if we ever attempted that again). It was just an ordinary friendship. We shared secrets, encouraged each other (and sometimes not), we enjoyed each other (and found fault), we laughed a lot and we cried a bit. But if I had not met her I would be somewhere entirely different. Here's a map.


got me a job at a Greek restaurant

where I met Rabab

who, when I was tired of the restaurant, introduced me to

the Bs, who were the first family for whom I nannied.

At the bus stop I took to work I met Lisa

who introduced me to the people who knew that

H & R were looking for a nanny about the time I needed a change from the Bs.

So I nannied for them until I realized I was nearing 30 and really wanted stuff like a full salary and benefits, which also coincided with H & R having a 2nd kid and H deciding to be an at-home mom.

H was working for a company that was joint venturing a downtown project with the Rouse Company and she knew they were looking for a secretary. So H made the introductions and I

got the job where I met


who I subsequently worked with at 2 other companies.

Because of this job I started hanging out at the restaurant in our building where I met

Richard & Steph

who introduced me to The Spouse

which led to the eventual existence of The Child.

And that doesn't even cover all of it.

Because I met DMV I also met Ree, who is now one of my best friends and a big part of the reason I became Catholic, and Nicole, who is also a bestie & the reason I made it to France.

The restaurant was also where I met Cardinal Sin and the woman who would someday become my sister-in-law.

And Muffin's room-mate Dot had a boyfriend who was a drummer in a band with Oakland Fats, yet another very dear friend.

There are at least half a dozen other relationships and key life experiences that are a result of that one freshman year encounter. The ironic thing is that Muffin and I lost touch round about the time The Child was a year old. I heard rumors that she'd gone through some bizarre, difficult experience and unloaded a lot of people in the process. About 10 years ago, right around this time, we ran into her on the way to a meeting with our mortgage broker. She didn't have time to talk but gave me her business card. Grudgingly, it would appear, as she never returned my calls. And that was that.

People come and go. Sometimes they stay for life and sometimes not. Sometimes they come in and out. It's just the way of things. But sometimes I really wish that Muffin and I could have one more glass of wine, for old times sake. I'd like to properly thank her.

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Blogger Eric opined...

Thanks Muffin

March 07, 2007 1:57 PM  
Blogger jp opined...

Those little arrows were pretty cool.

March 07, 2007 2:22 PM  
Blogger Lorraine opined...

Glad you can still say that, honey.

Yeah, JP. Pretty much the whole reason I told that story. Just for the arrows.

March 07, 2007 3:02 PM  
Blogger Renee opined...

Wow, that's amazing. Now I'm trying to think of my own "maps" that started with just one person....

March 07, 2007 3:02 PM  
Blogger Iwanski opined...

Genius insights.

March 07, 2007 3:48 PM  
Anonymous stacy opined...

*mapping out peeps in my head*

March 07, 2007 3:50 PM  
Blogger Lorraine opined...

I can do it with a few other people, Renee, but none as extensive as Muffin.

Iwanski, Pft.

Stacy, Don't forget the little arrows. Or push pins. Push pins and string are nice.

March 07, 2007 4:08 PM  
Blogger Red7Eric opined...

Does Muffin know that she's called Muffin? If so, I hope she reads this. How very cool.

Do I have a Muffin? I'll have to think about it ...

March 07, 2007 7:37 PM  
Blogger rosemary opined...

No Muffin in my life ...although I still hear from a grammar school friend every year on my birthday. But, I have never had a really good friend or trusted many people with secrets or girlfrined loss. < > {} []...these are way cool....I'll have to figure out a way to use them.

March 07, 2007 8:06 PM  
Blogger Sling opined...

tegzvehfI spend an inordinate amount of time thinking of just such things as this.
I can literally trace my place in the world back to a one-legged stranger I met when I was but a toddlin' lad.(way too many arrows to enumerate here)..
I'm convinced there is a divine plan

March 07, 2007 8:28 PM  
Blogger Sling opined...

"tegzvehfI"...okay,..blogger took my word verification and decided to put it at the beginning of my comment.(so you can see how truly evil WV is)...just sayin'.

March 07, 2007 8:33 PM  
Anonymous Robert opined...

Wow...thats great...u r one of those luckiest ones who have been gifted with such a person apart from family and close far as I am concerned..if not this much but yes...I cannot also deny the fact that I do have people who have played such roles and also play still now in my life...they are too much precious to me :) good post!

March 08, 2007 4:41 AM  
Anonymous divamom opined...

Muffin...I miss those times...good times....cappucino anyone?

March 09, 2007 5:17 PM  
Blogger Lorraine opined...

Ack! Divamom! I so owe you an email. Glad you're still in the picture, babe!

March 09, 2007 5:19 PM  

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