Monday, March 20, 2006

The Power of Positive Thinking


The weather this morning is absolutely, perfectly spring-like. The sky is clear, a light frost is giving way to warmth and the air is full of bird-song (and jet liners, but I'm ignoring that, as it does not suit my purpose or mood). All manner of things are budding and bursting and dripping with new life. I have, as you've seen, successfully balanced an egg on it's end, which can apparently only be accomplished on the Vernal Equinox. So I'm feeling pretty sassy.

The Child is doing a report on Egypt and she learned yesterday that they only have 2 seasons there. ("Hot and hotter", said The Spouse). I cannot imagine living somewhere that doesn't have 4 distinct seasons, if for no other reason that the start of a new season is like a do-over, a fresh page. In that vein, I've been thinking a lot lately about the power of thinking positively. "If you build it, they will come," as Shoeless Joe Jackson famously told Kevin Costner before he became box-office poison.

I am by no means "new age" in my thinking but I do believe that if you visualize something enough it can become a reality. I've done it on at least 2 ocassions. And what with the dawning of spring, I've decided not to become distracted or bound by pesky realities but will create the world I want to live in just by saying it is so. Therefore:

I look fabulous in a bathing suit. And I don't even have to work at it. In fact, the medical community is still trying to figure out how, after pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding I ended up leaner and perkier than I began. Nicole Kidman wishes she had my hair.

I have received the Nobel Prize for Literature and the Pulitzer. I didn't submit anything to a publisher. They just think I'm brilliant and gave me these pretty awards. They come with money. I'm buying a house in the South of France.

I am embarking later this week on a 50 state speaking tour. Turns out that I'm the best mother ever and it would be wrong not to share all my wisdom with others. Sure, I am still impatient and hardly ever bake cookies but remember? We're ignoring piddly facts.

We have a ton of money. I mean, a ton. Don't even know what to do with it all.

Now you try. It's fun!

(I would personally like to that the Bush Administration for reminding me that wishful thinking is always preferable to facing facts. You guys rock. Happy Anniversary. Mission so accomplished.)

6 Comments:

Blogger jpdc opined...

Hillary is the president, Gilmore Girls is new every week, and Jon Bon Jovi will be at home waiting for me when I get there tonight.

I like this.

March 20, 2006 10:33 AM  
Blogger Display Name opined...

U2, a-ha and Kate Bush are all performing together in my home town, naturally I have back stage passes. My cat does not shed it's winter coat on everything I own and my complexion is flawless. Wow! This really is fun.

March 20, 2006 12:35 PM  
Blogger Iwanski opined...

I've been jogging five miles a day.
Ever since they took the calories out of beer, ribs and fried chicken, I've been losing 5 pounds a month.

I have finished directing my second feature length film, and seeing as the first one made a profit of $60 million, the studio gave me the green light to spend as much as I need. I only needed $18 millin, so a profit is nearly guaranteed, and I got a great deal on points with this one.

Tomorrow night, my wife and I are invited to dinner at the White House with President Feingold. Since the President is a Green Bay Packer fan, I'm going to have to rub it in a little that the Bears have won the last three Super Bowls.

March 20, 2006 3:13 PM  
Blogger charlie opined...

The Power of Positive thought works like a charm. Each and ever time. Without fail. Surefire. Except when your thought involves other people doing something. Try it out on your next plumber or builder or electrician and see how ineffectual it is then.
charlie

March 21, 2006 1:30 AM  
Blogger Amy opined...

It is 1990 and I'm happy again.

Oh wait. I wasn't happy in 1990... nix that.

It is 1990 and.. eh... -

Wait...

ARGH!!

Explain to me how this positive thinking thing works again???

March 21, 2006 3:51 AM  
Blogger Legal Alien opined...

Al Gore is president. And he's my uncle. We hang out a lot.

The new seasons of Hill Street Blues and Firefly are about to start.

I have learned the Open Palm Dragon's Breath technique, and my ninja training is complete. Now I can focus on my latest Great American Novel. (You would think the reading public would be happy with my first nine, but no.)

March 21, 2006 8:05 AM  

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